Therapists Are People Too

I was absolutely horrified to learn as a young therapist that other therapists were just people too. People with imperfect relationships. People with anxiety. People with depression, ADHD, PTSD and all sorts of other labels. I had somehow gotten the idea into my head that therapists were this unique form of human perfection - that they had figured it all out. This younger version of me WANTED therapists to be more highly evolved beings than everyone else. They must have the secrets to the universe, right?! least the secrets to happiness and fulfillment and healthy relationships, right?! I wanted in on the secret!!! Surprise! The secret is that therapists are just people too AND this is a very good thing. By living beautiful and messy lives just like you, by being real people, with real relationships and real struggles just like you, therapists are better equipped to authentically understand when you say, "I am overwhelmed as a parent," "It is a struggle to get out of bed." “I get so anxious trying to talk to people.” I have been there. I hear you. I get it. I am person too. I will make faces at you when tell me something unbelievable. Sometimes I will even say “what an a*$hole!” when you tell me about the unbelievable thing your ex did because we have a real relationship and I am real person. And your ex….well, he sounds like a real a*$hole. I gave up on being a “blank slate” therapist. (It always freaked me out to talk to someone who didn’t react to what I said. I want to talk to a person not a robot!!! I am guessing you might want to talk to a real person too.) Yes, I get, respect, and advocate for professional boundaries. No, we can't go out to lunch after this. No, your session is not about my issues. (I have got my own real person therapist for that). Yes, if I wasn't your therapist I would want to be your friend. This is me, I am a real person too. Imperfect AND that is a good thing. Find a therapist who is real. Find a therapist who is a person too!